The Divorce Insider Blog

Here is the most updated tips,  strategies and secrets about divorce so you can get your best divorce outcome.

5 Things You Need to Do to Go From Feeling Uncertain About Divorce to Having Clarity

before divorce Jan 09, 2024
Woman sitting in chair Uncertain About Divorce

Are you feeling uncertain about divorce? 

Are you pretty certain you want a divorce, but can't help and feel like maybe you should try harder, now that your spouse is actually trying?  You keep thinking, "the grass is greener where you water it?"  But you also think you just don't have anything left to give?  

Wondering what your next steps are?  

The first step in going from feeling uncertain about divorce to feeling more confident and secure is to understand what your rights are in a divorce.  Then weigh your options.  Before you make a decision to stay in the marriage or tell your spouse you want a divorce with a thoughtful solution.  When you act now, you will feel more at peace and not worry about your fair share.  

Know the Divorce Laws

If you want to go from feeling uncertain about divorce, the first thing to know is the law. Every place has its own rules for divorce, and knowing what they are can help you figure out what to do.

  1. Look Up Laws: Start by finding out about the laws where you live. These rules decide how things like money, kids, and belongings will be split in a divorce. You can look online or talk to a lawyer who knows about this stuff.
  2. Ask a Lawyer: It might sound scary, but lawyers are there to help! They can tell you your rights and what to expect during a divorce. Don't be afraid to ask questions – that's what they're there for!

Thinking About Your Choices

Sometimes, you might feel stuck, not sure if divorce is the right choice. Exploring your options can help clear things up.

  1. Consider Counseling: Talking to a counselor or therapist might be a good idea. They can help you and your spouse talk about your feelings and see if there's a way to fix things.
  2. Know What Matters: Think about what's important to you. Is it your kids, money, or something else? Knowing what you care about can help you make decisions about what you want more of in the future.

Creating a Plan Alone and then Together

If divorce seems like the only option, it's important you figure out what you want FIRST then work with your spouse to get to an agreement.

  1. Start Talking: Having an open and honest talk with your spouse is crucial. It might be hard, but it's essential to share your thoughts and listen to theirs.  
  2. Make a Plan: Sit down together and write down what you both agree on. This plan should cover things like money, kids, and belongings. Making a clear plan can help avoid fights later on.
  3. Ask for Help: After you take get an agreement on some things, you could have a lawyer look it over and give you their opinion.  Or, you could both sit down with a mediator for help might be a good idea too. They're like referees – they help you both find solutions.

The More You Know, the More Secure You Feel

Knowing how divorce works and exploring your options can help you feel more confident and less worried if your marriage ends.

Plus, get support.: Divorce is tough. Don't go through it alone. Talk to people you trust – friends, family, or a counselor. Having someone to listen can make things easier.

Moving Forward

Remember, deciding on a divorce is a big step. Take your time, think carefully, and don't rush into anything. Finding a solution that works for both you and your spouse is the goal.

If you want to learn more, check out our FREE TRAINING here:  Divorce-Ready Masterclass


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